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After DWTS Debut, Robert Irwin Stalked by Nature’s Fiercest Predators: Cougars

After DWTS Debut, Robert Irwin Stalked by Nature’s Fiercest Predators: Cougars

After DWTS Debut, Robert Irwin Stalked by Nature’s Fiercest Predators: Cougars

Chadwick Dipshit

Wednesday, September 17, 2025

Wednesday, September 17, 2025

Audience members claim the ballroom floor was “thick with pheromones” after Irwin’s steamy routine. “I swear I saw at least three women silently circling him,” said one crew member. “It was like watching a nature documentary, we were just waiting for David Attenborough to start narrating.”

Audience members claim the ballroom floor was “thick with pheromones” after Irwin’s steamy routine. “I swear I saw at least three women silently circling him,” said one crew member. “It was like watching a nature documentary, we were just waiting for David Attenborough to start narrating.”

Audience members claim the ballroom floor was “thick with pheromones” after Irwin’s steamy routine. “I swear I saw at least three women silently circling him,” said one crew member. “It was like watching a nature documentary, we were just waiting for David Attenborough to start narrating.”

LOS ANGELES, CA — Following his steamy Dancing With the Stars debut, Robert Irwin has reportedly found himself the target of a new apex predator: women over 40.

“Cougars are highly intelligent hunters,” said Dr. Lana Myers, a wildlife expert. “Once they catch the scent of a confident young man in khakis, there’s no escape.”

Audience members claim the ballroom floor was “thick with pheromones” after Irwin’s steamy routine. “I swear I saw at least three women silently circling him,” said one crew member. “It was like watching a nature documentary, we were just waiting for David Attenborough to start narrating.”

Social media confirmed the frenzy, with one fan posting: “Forget dancing… this man’s about to be on the wrong end of a National Geographic special.”

At press time, producers were reportedly considering installing a cougar-proof enclosure around the dance floor to keep Irwin from being “dragged into the wild.”

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Copyright © 2025 - The Dipshit Daily - All rights reserved

Copyright © 2025 - The Dipshit Daily - All rights reserved